current state of affairs
Mar. 4th, 2025 08:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
saltbreezei need to create a proper schedule/system and routine for these things ... i often forget to brush my teeth at night which i feel says lots about me
quite humiliating . i'll begin this in my notes app or something. workout/study routine ... maybe i could schedule my freetime after school ?
seems smart ! god aren't i a genius ?!?!
i have to remember that i have to work ten times harder than everyone else to be the same level they are , and then a hundred times harder to be better ! even just a little better … stupid fucking magnet school stupid fucking white people with PRE-MADE NETWORKS AT BIRTH
i feel like i was born in the mud and i am yet to crawl out ... it must be time soon
i feel pretty okay about chemistry .just need to figure out how to balance and do the p1v1t1=p2v2t2 thing ...
cause i can't cross multiply for SHIT .had a math test and no idea how i did .... going to take a retake that i feel good about !
my grades in both of the classes are terrible though ... i feel ill it's almost the end of the quarter .... i'm fucked
still have the second one but i don't feel too great about it considering it'll be exam season ...
things to focus on current;y
reached out got a little help not much is really happening though ... spring break is coming up so i could probably
add something to my aweomse list of things .s.........
i want to buy an 86 dollar flip phone ... a 130 dollar camera lens .... more clothes ... but we can worry about that lataarrrrr
i'm running low on hair gel and i want to buy a mousse ... also i need to grocery shop this weekend for my protein foods
i do not allow myself to talk about my current or past romantic relationship(s) on this blog anymore
because i am not allowing myself to have opinions on them because all that ever does is hurt whoever i'm with
because i fucking SUCK !!!
anyways i'm fine mentally ... yes i get a little upset whenever i think about this one section of my life i don't feel all that great about
but there is nothing i can really do about it so i kind of just have to suck it up and say i love it !
i have felt like renouncing humanity completely lately ... but that's how you end up friendless and alone ...
but that's probably for the best . redacted redacted redacted
all of the bad stuff that happened to me never really got fixed or anything
nothing i can do about it now
quite humiliating . i'll begin this in my notes app or something. workout/study routine ... maybe i could schedule my freetime after school ?
seems smart ! god aren't i a genius ?!?!
i have to remember that i have to work ten times harder than everyone else to be the same level they are , and then a hundred times harder to be better ! even just a little better … stupid fucking magnet school stupid fucking white people with PRE-MADE NETWORKS AT BIRTH
i feel like i was born in the mud and i am yet to crawl out ... it must be time soon
i feel pretty okay about chemistry .just need to figure out how to balance and do the p1v1t1=p2v2t2 thing ...
cause i can't cross multiply for SHIT .had a math test and no idea how i did .... going to take a retake that i feel good about !
my grades in both of the classes are terrible though ... i feel ill it's almost the end of the quarter .... i'm fucked
still have the second one but i don't feel too great about it considering it'll be exam season ...
things to focus on current;y
- reading ! doing pretty okay . plowing through this old novel i was reading a while ago and had dropped .. girlfriend said "still ?" when i told her what i was reading and my heart sunk a little . it's been doing that a bit more lately
- reading BIBLE be CATHOLIC GIRL !
- caloric deficit .. now that i'm off weed it's a lot easier . felt like i did okay today ? i think i'm around 1600 for today so i should cut myself off
- studies ... i feel okay currently ... studying to get ahead and working on future assignments wouldn't hurt though
- investing ! came up the idea of a custiodial account today ... going to set up tomorrow
- summer intership . still haven't talked about it to my mother ... only god knows DO BEFORE APRIL 15TH
reached out got a little help not much is really happening though ... spring break is coming up so i could probably
add something to my aweomse list of things .s.........
i want to buy an 86 dollar flip phone ... a 130 dollar camera lens .... more clothes ... but we can worry about that lataarrrrr
i'm running low on hair gel and i want to buy a mousse ... also i need to grocery shop this weekend for my protein foods
i do not allow myself to talk about my current or past romantic relationship(s) on this blog anymore
because i am not allowing myself to have opinions on them because all that ever does is hurt whoever i'm with
because i fucking SUCK !!!
anyways i'm fine mentally ... yes i get a little upset whenever i think about this one section of my life i don't feel all that great about
but there is nothing i can really do about it so i kind of just have to suck it up and say i love it !
i have felt like renouncing humanity completely lately ... but that's how you end up friendless and alone ...
but that's probably for the best . redacted redacted redacted
all of the bad stuff that happened to me never really got fixed or anything
nothing i can do about it now
